It’s here! The first day in May! The first something in May! What is that term and is this even what it means or is it something else to do with Vogue? I don’t know! What I’m talking about is the Met Gala 2023, which it feels like we’ve waited 84 years for but also in a very real way, it feels like yesterday when Kim Kardashian promoted toxic diet culture on the red carpet and then pissed everyone off by ripping Marilyn Monroe‘s dress.
Anyway we’re back, there are celebrities wearing things on the red carpet, lots on. Let’s get into it.
Kim Kardashian
If you haven’t seen this photo yet you don’t have any social media. All the comparisons have been made – it’s SKIMS meets Kim’s Playboy cover. She knew what she was doing and she did it WELL.
Kendall Jenner
IDK man, you’re a Kardashian! You have access to ANY OUTFIT and you chose to go as Mr. Fantastico The Phantasmagoric Magician or whatever?
Okay the colours are incredible here, and then she took off the coat and its this fire engine red gown underneath. It’s not exciting but it’s a huge step up from the trucker cap bridal dress FIASCO from last year.
Pedro Pascal
I mean, we all just collectively came, didn’t we? GOD DAMN.
Gonna need all men wearing bike shorts and high socks from here on out.
Janelle Monae
This was one of those double outfit things that honestly, is why we bother with the Met Gala.
Good work Janelle. Do we know what’s going on? No. Is it on theme? Couldn’t give a fuck. Do we love it? Absolutely.
Kim Petras
Everyone out here trying to break their ankles but I must admit the platforms looks fucking amazing on Kim Petras, even if I feel like the actual dress is just a big Ye Olde curtain wrapped around a few times.
Cardi B
She will NOT be able to sit down to eat the chicken kiev with a jus finish in this, but this cosplay as Karl thing is working for me.
Jennifer Lopez
You could honestly lift this and pop it in the Birdcage at the Melbourne Cup.
Lizzo
Dripping in pearls? Check. A train that isn’t so long it’s ridiculous but long enough to add drama? Check. I’m 50/50 on the booties – are they too 2010’s Wednesdays at The Sheaf for me? Sort of. Are we doing ankle boots with couture gowns? I’m not sold. Are they still super chic with the pearls and the asymmetrical top bit? Yes.
Lil Nas X
*Huge breath* SLAAAAAAAY SLAY SLAY SLAY SLAYYYYYYY.
SLAAAAYAYAYAYAYAYYYYY *passes out*
Lea Michele
She is DRIPPING. It’s incredible.
Florence Pugh
I mean it’s spectacular, well done. Just, you know, enjoy trying to get through doors Miss Flo.
Doja Cat
It was only a matter of time before someone arrived as Choupette, Karl Lagerfeld’s cat.
Honestly Doja Cat is quite literally unhinged, and I love it but I don’t know if we had to go FULL method with the cat makeup. The claws and hood were enough! You just know she’s going to start prowling around various tables after a few champers and everyone will be like, can someone get a taxi for Doja, she’s making it weird.
Anne Hathaway
Andie Sachs has entered the building!!! Anne’s glow up is just continuing to GLOW UP. Soon we’ll all perish in the light of her iconic fashion aura.
FKA Twigs
She knows how to work it, even when “it” is a grey scarf from Vinnies pinned to an otherwise lovely column dress.
Anitta
I am so, so concerned for her ankles. But also any other shoe would not make sense. The price of fashion is ending up in E.R and waiting eight hours with half your foot falling off.
Yara Shahidi
I am honestly obsessed with this, and I don’t even know why. It’s the gold and the bodice and the hair… IDK, I am a total hypocrite ‘cos it’s not even that interesting and every other person in a borzo outfit I’ve been like “next”, but is that not the human condition, if we were to get philosophical about it? We are all, at our core, utter hypocrites. You didn’t suspect you’d be thinking philosophically in a Met Gala 2023 fashion wrap, did you???
Ashley Graham
At first I was like “what in the 1995 Prom Barbie?” but then I decided that actually, it’s so disgustingly glamouuuuur that I kind of love it. At least she went balls to the wall! It’s the Met Gala 2023! This is what the people want!
Phoebe Bridgers
I mean she looks lovely – I don’t know if it needed the train, but I’m enjoying the bodice detail. Mainly, because I’m a bitch who loves drama and a disgusting gossip, I’m wondering if things have gotten REALLY frosty between Phoebe and…
Daisy Edgar-Jones
Paul Mescal’s BFFFFFL Daisy Edgar-Jones! I love when exes and friends-of-exes collide at the Met Gala, like last year with Austin Butler and Vanessa Hudgens and Kaia Gerber and Jacob Elordi and WHY DO I KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT THESE PEOPLE? Anyway, Daisy looks great etc etc, unsure about hairstyle but generally fab, more importantly has the water flowed under the bridge enough yet? Look probably, we aren’t even sure if there’s water that must be flowed under any bridges, maybe they amicably broke up and Phoebe amicably started pashing Bo Burnham and everyone is v amicable!!!!! But you know, fun to wonder.
Lily James
It seems boring at first but then you realise it’s ENTIRELY MADE OF LEATHER. Then I felt bad for the animals ‘cos it’s a silly little couture dress that will not be worn again. Then I hoped maybe it was pleather? Then I worried about the environment. Then my generalised anxiety ventured out to the WHOLE EVENT and wondered what the point of all these celebrities marching around in overpriced fashion meant for the world. Then I realised AI will probably destroy us all in a few years.
It’s really fun being in my brain.
Emily Ratajkowski
It’s fine. She looks great. Etc.
Suki Waterhouse
Suki is notorious for wearing lovely, fashionable things that are also not very exciting. I thought maybe after Daisy Jones and the Six, she would be channelling some 70s vibes but now, it’s just nice nude florals. For spring? Groundbreaking.
Maya Hawke
THE NEPO BABIES HAVE ARRIVED, I REPEAT, THE NEPO BABIES HAVE ARRIVED. This is actually incredible, it’s fluffy and weird but still very fashion, like Anna Wintour is happy, we are happy, all is well.
Precious Lee
I kind of wish the whole DRESS was in that leather/latex material but Precious had the red carpet attitude to make this un-boring.
Amanda Seyfried
I thought I hated this because in every photo, Amanda looks SO EXCITED TO BE HERE, but a) I love the Studio 54 energy of it all, and b) actually, CAN people be more excited to be here? You’re literally being paid to bop around a red carpet in couture. Amanda gets it.
Ben Platt
It’s giving ‘giant torso, tiny legs’ ye olde tailoring vibes, but Ben Platt ALWAYS gives it his all at the Met Gala and considering most celebrity men just shuffle in wearing a tuxedo they could have picked up at Giordano, I respect it.
Julia Garner
MOTHER.
Margot Robbie
This is a fucking stunning dress, it’s not exciting or anything but it’s just so damn gorgeous, I have no notes.
Jessica Chastain
I worked out that everyone’s wearing sunnies as a very OBVIOUS homage to Karl Lagerfeld for the Met Gala 2023, but I still hate it. Take them off, it’s practically midnight.
Sydney Sweeney
It’s giving me in Year 10 design class when I made a perfectly nice dress but felt the need to add weird shit to it like pearls and ribbon, and ended up looking like I’d rolled down the main aisle of Spotlight. HOWEVER. This is the couture version, so of course it looks way better.
Irina Shayk
She’s here, she’s Irina Shayk, she looks pretty an– WAIT, WHAT ARE THOOOOOSE:
Pharmacy shoe racks everywhere are shaking RN.
Ice Spice
My favourite thing about the Met Gala is when “new” celebrities are invited and you just know the Nicole Kidmans of this world are either confused about whether they’re some junior fashion writer for Vogue, or someone their kid follows on Instagram. Aside from these thoughts, this is fine. IDK if it’s the Met Gala! You’re Ice Spice! Wear something more dramatic like a huge shawl filled with candy.
Michaela Coel
Aside from the fact I’d have Grade 11 eczema from this dress, my GOD is it stunning. Star boobs! A strange diamante merkin! The– WAIT, WHAT ARE THOOOOSE:
I won’t have it. No. We are not making toe shoes a thing again.
Margaret Qualley
Here is the thing with the Met Gala, okay? It’s meant to be about FASHION and HOMAGE and WHATEVER, but also it’s gotten so huge and celebrity-riddled that it’s also, let’s be honest, about statement-making and keeping the peasants (us) happy with fun, zany outfits. So technically, Margaret Qualley is completely on point here – she’s wearing vintage Lagerfeld (probably, I can’t be arsed looking it up), she looks great… but it’s also piss-boring and I don’t care for it.
Olivia Wilde
Are we a priest? A gladiator? Wearing a golden portal to hell on our chest? We don’t know, but every time I see Olivia Wilde these days I feel like she’s internally screaming.
Anok Yai
This is what I like to see at my Met Gala 2023! Giant bustle things! Every possible adornment from feathers to huge sequins, like we’ve raided a Spotlight store! Unexplained masks!
David Byrne
The fuck is this man doing, the only person who is allowed props is Lady Gaga. THIS IS NOT THE TOUR DE FRANCE.
Nicole Kidman And Keith Urban
She’s wearing the Chanel No. 5 dress she wore yonks ago for the ad and that is very fun and all, but I just enjoy how Keith Urban minces around the edges of His Nicole every time they walk a red carpet (as he should).
Emma Chamberlain
You can think something’s super cute but…
You can be wrong.
Taika Waititi And Rita Ora
On the flip side to Keith/Nicole, Taika won’t be walking the Met Gala 2023 red carpet in some plain old black suit, no siree. If anything he’s kind of the star here – what is that coat? It’s sort of a coat-dress-shawl. IDK but it’s doing things for me.
La La Anthony
There are VERY few people I’ll allow sunnies on for the red carpet. VERY FEW. It is stupid and it is night time and I am mainly speaking to YOU, Pete Davidson circa 2022. But La La Anthony? That’s allowed, especially since they’ve been bedazzled to match the gown, which is kind of the perfect blend between “I’m at a fashion event” and “I’m being a bit fun and silly”.
Dua Lipa
I mean, sure. It’s vintage Lagerfeld. Claudia Schiffer once wore it. But it also looks like a big picnic blanket with a bodice. She can invite some friends to sit on it for a little cucumber sandwich later.
Kate and Lila-Grace Moss
Well, and Kim Jones but we aren’t fashion people here. It’s all fine, I mean they’re really just banking on us all getting excited seeing mum and daughter on the red carpet together. Which did get me, I’ll admit! Hence why they’re in this list!